Thursday, 12 April 2018

BOOK:How to Win Friends and Influence People

learn the simple rule to win friends and influence people

If you want to make a good first impression, smile

2 if you want others to like you don't criticize them

3 If you want others to gladly do you favors, show your appreciation frequently.

4 If you want to be interesting yourself, be interested in others.

and much more

About book:-
Since How to Win Friends and Influence People Was published in 1936, it has sold over million copies. The advice contained within these blinks is deceptively simple but remains as effective as ever.
Just adhering to simple guidelines like smiling when meeting someone and remembering their first name can help anyone become more likable and influential.

In these How to Friends and Influence People you'll learn

* Why Theodore Roosevelt was so popular among his staff;

*Why being critical almost forced Abraham Lincoln into a saber duel;

*What everyone's favorite conversation topic is.

1.First Impression

 If you want to make a good first impression, smile.

It is our action, not our words, that show others what we think of them. Thus, when we meet someone new, the easiest way to say 
"I like and am very happy to meet you"  is to smile. We, humans, are suckers for people who smile at us. If we meet someone new and see them smile, we tend to automatically like them as well. The smile of a baby, for example, immediately makes us feel warm and fuzzy inside, as does seeing a dog wag his tail like crazy because he's so happy to see us.

If you're happy to see someone, the other person will be happy to see you too.

2.Don't Criticize Them

If you want others to like you, don't criticize them.

Criticizing people and pointing out their mistake doesn't encourage them to change their behaviour, and it certainly doesn't help them learn anything. This is because people are not primarily driven by reason but rather by emotion.

The person you Criticize won't really listen to what you're saying, because they will feel attacked and their natural reaction will to immediately defend their own position by fighting back.

Hence, Criticizing someone might help you blow off steam, but in the long-term, it will only make others like you less.

Abraham Lincoln learned this lesson as well. he used to publicly Criticize his opponents, until one day his Criticizing almost forced him into a saber duel. From that moment on, he stopped openly Criticizing others. During the civil war, he famously told those who spoke harshly of the southerners, "Don't Criticize them; they are just what we would be under similar circumstances."

If you want others to like you, try to understand what drives them, accept their shortcomings, and make it a rule to never Criticize them openly, for this Criticism will only come back to harm you.

3.Appreciation Frequently

If you want others to gladly do you favors, show your appreciation frequently.

How can you get someone to do you a favor? You must ensure they want to do it. And how is that possible? You must motivate the other person with a simple reward: your sincere appreciation.

To show your appreciation and make yourself someone people enjoy working with, use simple phrases such as "Thank you" or "I'm sorry", and learn to give sincere praise. Don't shower people with phony flattery, or they will see through it and it won't work.
Your appreciation must be honest.

4.Interested In Others

If you want to be interesting yourself, be interested in others.

We all love a good listener, especially when that person encourages us to speak about ourselves.All humans are naturally interested in themselves, and hence we're always happy to meet someone who shares this interest.

Therefore, to be more likable, try to be a good listener and encourage others to talk, especially about themselves.

5.What's Important to Them

Show your appreciation for others by talking about that's important to them.

The easiest way to get into the mindset of  appreciating others is to keep in mind the 
GOLDEN RULE: treat others as you would like others to treat you.

6. Remember Things

We like people who show their appreciation and remember things about us, like our names.

The simplest trick for generating affection is to remember and frequently use another person's name since everyone likes to hears own name. Whenever you meet someone new, remember their name and try to use it as you talk. The other person will like you instantly.

7. Avoid All Arguments

Avoid all arguments- they cannot be won.

There is nothing to gain from such arguments. No matter what the result, your opponent won't agree with you.Rather, they will just resent you and your arguments.

Therefore, the only solution is to avoid such disputes from the start.

8.Never Tell Others They Are Wrong

Never tell others they are wrong; they will only resent you.

Whenever you tell someone they are wrong, you're basically saying, "I'm smarter than you." This is a direct attack on their self-esteem. Their feelings will be hurt, and they will want to retaliate.

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